Advent - Day 1 - motivation.

Louise Mann has kindly made and sent me an advent candle this year.  She's done so to Niki and I in the past but we'd never got into a routine of using it.  This year I'm going to try and light it each day and spend the few minutes that it takes to burn to the next number simply being still; stopping and making time out from the business; and letting my mind dwell on a topic.  Where this will go I have no idea.  If you have any positive pre-conceived ideas about me I suggest you don't read these as I suspect they're going to be quite difficult at times.

Today my thoughts turned to motivation.  What is it that motivates me, and specifically why do I run?  I enjoy it, but I also like what it does to me.  I want to be slimmer, more healthy, more attractive, seen as an active kind of person.  A large part of what motivates me is (I'm a bit ashamed to say this) attracting others to me.  It's not selfless, seeking to help others have a better life, or other such noble causes but focussed on me.  Even at work I'm generally motivated by doing a good job so that I get recognition.  I don't really feel that my job is that productive or making a real difference to the world, but I wish it were.  I think that work is a topic that I'll be thinking about more over the next few weeks.  My prayer for today would be that when I'm doing things in the future I may be prompted to take a few seconds to consider why I'm doing it, and to potentially reassess my motivations and what they align with.